During the lull since my last entry, I've been feeling relief from pain and dread.
For about 7 years, I felt helpless when people whom I thought would be there for me, deserted me. Literally because they are no where to be found. The pain of panic and desperation was buried so deep inside, that it didn't hurt anymore until their healing. Many live under oppression everyday. I can empathized now.
My 3 blogs were expressions of the journey of facing my limitations and then dreaming again. I wanted to go deeper than the ordinary reactions but to see what makes us want beauty and meaning. I discovered I'm a geek but also a romantic who likes music and beauty: a weird combination.
As the pain caused by the oppression and desertion resurfaced, I faced my fears and they disappeared: the last week was really nice. Circumstantial problems remain but I feel so fit and light as I live my life. It seems that if I relax from the pressure and stress (not to bury my head from the difficulty), I'm better at finding the road ahead.
I think I'll be blogging words, pictures and videos as a more fulfilled me. The silence of the past week was me enjoying relief from desperation.
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